I Don't Want To Feel Blue Anymore
by Dajypop
Summary: After Beth and Hannah's disappearance, Chris and Josh share a bed for the first time since grade school. TW - Depression and Self-Harm


**Title:** I Don't Want To Feel Blue Anymore  
 **Author:** Daisy  
 **Fandom:** Until Dawn  
 **Setting:** Chris' apartment  
 **Pairing:** Josh Washington/Chris  
 **Characters:** Josh Washington, Chris, Hannah Washington, Beth Washington  
 **Genre:** Romance/Hurt/Comfort/Friendship  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Chapters:** 1/1  
 **Word Count:** 549  
 **Type of Work:** One-Shot  
 **Status:** Complete  
 **Warnings:** Gay, Slash, Yaoi, Pre-canon, Pre-slash, AU - Canon Divergence, Depression, Self-Harm TW, Nightmare TW, Fluff  
 **Disclaimer:** I don't own anything.  
 **Summary:** After Beth and Hannah's disappearance, Chris and Josh share a bed for the first time since grade school.

 **AN:** More! -smashes computer- This is delicious!

On a serious note, this story is going to be pretty angsty. I'm giving you a second warning that there is depression, nightmares, and mentions of self-harm. If these things will bother/trigger you, I highly advise against reading this.

 **I Don't Want To Be Blue Anymore** ****

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Nobody could have predicted what happened to Hannah and Best, least of all Josh and Chris, who had been too comfortable and drunk to know what was coming. Even still, guilt haunted them both, winding around their hearts and making them lurch in the middle of the night when they woke up from regret-lden nightmares, which meant they hardly spent five minutes apart. Josh had practically moved in with his blonde friend, and they both seemed a little better for it.

That was, until one day when Chris decided to get breakfast going before the other woke, bringing it in on a tray that nearly fell from his hands when he returned to the bedroom and Josh was _gone_. Food forgotten on the desk by the door, he dashed to the bathroom and slid the door open, giving a strangled gasp. Heart hammering in his throat, he saw his best friend laying in a heap, hugging the toilet like it was his saving grace, a long red gash spanning the length of his right thigh and a razor gripped in a quaking hand.

Dropping to his knees with a towel in hand, Chris crawled to his best friend, shaky hands managing to take the razor and chuck it somewhere, planning on getting it later. Pressing the towel to the other's thigh, keeping pressure on it, the blonde felt two hot tears roll down his cheeks.

"Josh! What were you thinking?! Don't you _dare_ do this to me! Please, don't leave me alone…"

"I failed Hannah and Betha, I could fail yo-"

" _Don't_. Do you really think Hannah and Beth would want you to do this? Do you really thing _I_ do?" Okay, maybe he was getting a bit shrill, but he couldn't help it. After a long pause filled with sniffles and light sobs on Josh's end, puffy red eyes turned up at him.

"N-no… W-would you-" Cut off by a large gulp of air, he sniffled, trying to make his nose and throat cooperate with speech, "Would you hold me for a while?" He craved contact, even if Chris might hate him, now. what the blonde had to say next surprised him into silence as he was handed some toilet paper for his runny nose.

"Let me patch you up, first, and then yes." It didn't take long for him to instruct Josh to keep pressure on his wound while he grabbed the first aid kit, "Um… All I have are Band-Aids. But… We'll make it work."

With fifteen bandages running up his leg, the brunet stayed close as they walked to the bed, laying down. Strong arms closed around him as the tears welled up once more, and he buried his face in the younger man's chest with a high-pitched whine. They stayed like that for a long time, before the well ran dry and Chris' shirt was soaked.

"I don't want to feel like this anymore." The elder finally whispered, voice quivering. Chris shushed him gently, holding him tight and rubbing his back as he kissed his forehead.

"I know. I've got you," Came the soft reply, "You should try to sleep. I'll stay here, awake, and protect you from the nightmares."

"Thanks, Chris."

"What are friends for?"

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 **AN:** Oh no, the angst! I hope it's good, though~ Until next time!


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